Recent Super Official News

• Mars Rover Finds First Signs Of Life On The Red Planet
• Mars Rover Comes Out Of The Closet
• Bill Murray Shows Up In Phoenix: Kicks Off Party Crashing Tour With A Bang
• NBC Explains Tape Delay And Censorship Of The Olympics
• Confirmed: Bill Murray’s Agent Will Be Attending Party In Phoenix On August 1st
• Mitt Romney To Legalize Marijuana And Gay Marriage, Once In Office
• Joe Paterno Statue Sold At Private Auction
• 69 Dead In Apparent Mass Joke Suicide
• Bill Murray Announces Party Crashing Tour Starting In August
• Obama Auctioning Off All Pot Seized In Drug Raids Since 2008
• TSA Now Offering Free Gift With All Full Body Cavity Searches
• Mitt Romney Leaving The Mormon Religion For Christianity
• Details Of The 5-Year Marriage Contract Between Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes
• Announced – The Big Lebowski 2: The Dude Goes To Washington
• Joe Arpaio Announces New Zombie Bath Salt Task Force Called SALTS
• DEA Chief Dodges More Questions Friday At Her Own Mental Health Screening
• Mitt Romney Campaign Using “Ron Paul Diversion Vehicles”
• New Drug Craze Leaves 3 Teenagers Hospitalized
• 9Gag Suing Reddit For 50 Million Dollars
• Gay Zombie Attack In Louisiana From Bath Salts Leaves 7 Dead
• Facebook Launches New Gold Account Program For $9.95/month
• North Carolina: First State Making It Illegal To Be Gay
• Prisoner Escape Used Scenes From The Shawshank Redemption
• Obama Says More Gay Comments, This Time About Nickelback
• Man Who Determined Ice Cube’s “Good Day” Awarded Nation’s Highest Medal
• Mitt Romney Mad About His Universe Selection As God In The Afterlife
• Billionaire’s New Presidential Campaign: Check None Of The Above
• Man Not Guilty in Killing Wife Over Too Many Facebook Game Requests
• Televangelist Pat Robertson Tells His Congregation That He’s Gay
• Obama Signs NTACT Into Law: Allows Waterboarding Marijuana Users
• New ‘Work to Fly’ Program Sponsored by Mitt Romney
• Local Man Stops Robbery By Quoting Pulp Fiction
• Rick Santorum Voted People’s Sexiest Republican Alive
• New Trayvon Martin Photos Emerge
• Maryland’s $640 Million Mega Millions Winner Comes Forward