Houston, TX — Exciting news for fat people around the world as McDonald’s has finally released the all new and highly anticipated Flying McLiger sandwich.
“The Flying McLiger sandwich is exclusively at McDonald’s for a limited time,” said McDonald’s Vice President Eric Burns. “If you don’t give a sh*t about your your health, weight, or endangered species, well then this is the perfect sandwich for you. So don’t have a heart attack trying to run down here and get one, there will be plenty to go around.”
The flying liger is a hybrid between a lion, a tiger and a falcon explains McDonald’s breeding expert Paul Horner. “A flying liger is exactly the same as a regular liger except with wings and the ability to fly,” Horner said. “With over 1,500 calories per serving and 420 added ingredients, it’s gonna taste so good going down into your huge swollen gut.”
All flying ligers live in captivity at the Flying Liger Ranch in Houston, Texas which is owned by the McDonald’s Corporation. “Ligers are tough enough to breed, now just try to imagine getting one of those things to have sex with a falcon,” Horner said. “A lot of sweat and tears goes behind the making of every Flying McLiger sandwich, so eat up all you huge pieces of sh*t.” Horner continued, “Flying ligers enjoy swimming, flying and are extremely sociable. Women and men that have a lot of sweat on them, especially underneath their breast areas, will f*cking love slamming these things down one after another.”
Stop by McDonald’s and get the one and only Flying McLiger sandwich for a limited time only! McDonald’s, I’m f*ckin’ lovin’ it!