Accused Rapist Found Not Guilty Using ‘Todd Akin Defense’

The Ass Press
Posted: 08/24/2012 3:41:14 PM PDT

Todd AkinDequincy, LA — In a move that is shocking the nation today, the Honorable Judge Paul Horner of Dequincy Louisiana, reversed the guilty verdict of accused rapist Daryl James Thompson based on what the judge is calling the ‘Todd Akin Defense’. Horner said that since it was legitimate rape and that the victim actually got pregnant from Thompson, it proves the man could not have raped her. This announcement comes just days after Republican Todd Akin’s controversial comments aired on a St. Louis TV station. “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down,” Akin said on Sunday.

Thompson was in court today for sentencing. This is when Horner announced he was reversing the jury’s unanamous guilty verdict from two weeks prior. Horner then dismissed all charges, apologized to Thompson for his time and then released him from custody. The decision by the judge is making headlines not just because the victim was able to positively identify her rapist but because the baby she gave birth to also matched Thompson’s DNA exactly. This is now the first accused rapist to be found not guilty using this new ‘Todd Akin Defense’.

Brandon Adams who was the State’s Prosecutor on the case said he was stunned by the judges decision and is now worried about future cases involving rape. “What Judge Horner did here today will set a precedent that can now be used in any future and past rape cases. Any rapist who impregnated a woman can now use the ‘Todd Akin Defense’. The scary part is this also applies to anyone in prison who is currently serving time for their crime,” Adams said. “We could realistically see thousands of violent rapists back on the streets in the next 30-90 days.”

Outside the Courthouse, Reverend Matt Johnson from the Holy Lovers Methodist Church in Dequincy talked to reporters and said he supports the judges decision. “Judge Horner is doing god’s work,” Johnson said. “Republican Todd Akin is an amazing man and his beautiful words spoken the other day have inspired a remarkable person like Paul Horner to let an innocent man remain free. We have to obey what our elected officials like Akin say, and that is exactly what Judge Horner did. Our god is truly shining his everlasting love down on the town of Dequincy today.”

Family members of the rape victim said they don’t agree with the judge’s decision today whatsoever. The victim’s father spoke briefly to reporters before leaving with the other members of the family who were there for sentencing. “Judge Horner is completely insane and not living in this century. He’s out of touch with society and someone needs to legitimately rape him.”

The family of Daryl James Thompson has setup a hotline so people can send in their donations to help others wrongly found guilty of rape. They say the funds collected will be used for attorney fees to help those currently in prison be released as soon as possible.

  • The Daryl James Thompson Rape Release Hotline: (785) 273-0325



  1. Does this mean that she can now get child support from her rapist?

  2. Seven…when you refer to the ‘rapist’ as bastard, does this mean he could have been conceived from a ‘legitimate’ rape as well?

    • I don’t know… probably wasn’t legitimate rape. That sounds too good for a guy like this. I’m thinking it was just your regular run of the mill type of rape

  3. Does Mr Akin even know how a child is conceived ? and I am really interested to know how a female body can shut that process down….

  4. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man

  5. This guy needs to be in jail! How messed up is this!

  6. Dis anyone else notice that the judge is named Paul Horner, same as the supposed pulp fiction robbery hero?

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